15 November 2008

Joe the Capitalist

First I was just a guy who called myself Joe, and who worked as a plumber without a license. But now... holy shit! My little conversation with Obama made national news... and now McCain has mentioned me three times in that debate! People are calling me up for interviews and banging on my door, and Palin is talking about me in her stump speeches! This is awesome!

Quick, I better write a book. No one will think my co-author actually wrote the whole thing, even though it's going to already hit the presses by the first of December. Totally realistic. Plus, what if people forget about me?

And quick, let me launch a subscription website. People will pay to read "Joe the Blog" and access "Joe the Forum," certainly!

Get a scrap of celebrity and fight to milk it for every ounce it's worth: truly the American dream.

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