07 February 2010

Five Reasons to support Palin 2012

I just watched her impassioned, scattershot speech at the Tea Party Convention. She especially shied away from direct commitment to running for President in 2012. Here are some reasons why I support her campaign, and think you should too:
  • Not only would we have a First Gentleman, we'd also have a First Daughter Baby-Daddy. Palin isn't even governor anymore, and Levi's still making news on Entertainment Tonight. Think how awesome it would be to see him on his own reality show, as he drives in his pickup to the White House to pick up his son for their weekly visit.
  • Being President means Palin would spend less time with her children. If you won't support her for her own sake, support Palin for the sake of her children. It's only going to do them good to get her away from them.
  • It would only be for two years anyway. When it got tough being Governor of Alaska, she quit. Alaska has a part-time legislature, distributes money taken from oil companies to all of its citizens, and consists of 0.002% of the national population. If she couldn't hack running that, how long do you think she'd last in the big seat? So even if you don't like her, you're not due for a full four years of it.
  • If you don't support her, you hate special-needs children and love taxes. That's just a fact, just like how failing to support Obama meant you were a racist.
  • Executive orders will be issued entirely on Facebook. "Sarah Palin reinstates Don't Ask, Don't Tell: you gays get away from my son" and "Sarah Palin orders drilling for oil anywhere it's sandy" and "Sarah Palin just bought a new goat on Farmville!"

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